N is for Nervous

I will not be making a fool of myself tonight. I will not be making a fool of myself tonight. I will not be making a fool of myself tonight.

Things will go well, people will be friendly, and all this anxiety will be for nothing.

Is it wrong of me to hope for someone to have a medical emergency so I can feel useful and have something to do/talk about? Maybe a grease fire will start up. No, those are awful. I’d say a small choking, but someone famous must have choked to death once in New York, because rescue signs for that are everywhere. Plus, I don’t think I could do a decent Heimlich in heels. Anyhow. Ahem. Repeat. I will not be making a fool of myself tonight.

Today’s already gone awesomely — I met Sherrilyn Kenyon! I stayed around after her award speech today to meet her. Her speech was the most touching thing ever. I thought I had had a lot of rejection on my path to publication, but holy cow…I don’t know if I could have gone through everything that she did and kept pushing on. I’m just not that strong. (You guys know I’m tough, and where I work and what I do. But after hearing her life story, trust me,  she’s super tough.)

I was going to wedge another panel in, only I knew I was too nervous to really just sit there and listen to someone else speak. I have to change into another outfit and redo my makeup and head off to my agency thing, and then off to St. Martin’s party, too.

Okay. Today’s been good. Tonight’s gonna be great. Everything will turn out just fine.

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